ABOUT 2 MONTHS AGO • 2 MIN READ

Bring Back Analog Hobbies

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It’s Cleb

…but, you knew that probably. If you didn’t I’m a gay, non-binary, gemini bimbo who loves coffee, laughing, and wiggling my butt to hyperpop. I send a seriously unserious email every sunday talking about goofy things I’m thinking, bad business ideas, and food that excites me.

Take Your Meds, Go Outside,
And Soothe Your Soul.

It seems like every time you ask someone what their hobbies are these days they say “oh i like talking to friends and playing video games”. Whatever happened to going to the roller rink, going to the bowling alley, going to the cafe? BACK WHEN MY MEEMAW AND PEEPAW WERE GROWING UP, THEY DIDN’T HAVE CELL PHONES. These bitches had to walk up hill in the snow both ways to get to the bowling alley and hope their friends wrote in their agendas so their undiagnosed ADHD wouldn’t flair up and cause confusion and/or time blindness.

I recently went to a bowling alley in rural South Carolina, 10 dollars for 3 hours of play. Now that’s a good old fashioned bargain right there. It’s rare to see that kind of old fashioned, kind-hearted, well-priced, family fun anymore. DON’T even get me started on the reasonably priced concession stand chicken tenders and french fry combo.

During my time bowling, I realized two things. First, bowling is a lot more fun when you are taking your anxiety medication. Allow me to elaborate, growing up I thought that everyone was watching me all the time. (Likely unrelated, but growing up Christian I was taught that people were always watching me). Bowling is a famously silly looking sport and I hated the concept of my body be perceived as doing something silly. Also consider, what if I was bad at it? Now that I’m on Lexapro™️, I realized that bowling is silly, and doesn’t matter if I am good at it, because literally no one cares and I am not in a bowling league (yet). So I can choose to have fun.

Second, I need to get out of the house more. Getting out of the house is not going from one cozy/lazy environment to another. It is leaving the house and doing something soul-enriching and nourishing. I think seeking soul enrichment has been one of my biggest gifts this year to myself. So for me, bowling and doing something I felt deeply insecure about in a way that allowed me to reclaim past experiences was really liberating and enriching. I recommend trying it.

Reply Guys: Should we go bowling soon? Or maybe hit up the local roller rink?


Shitty Business Ideas:

Hello Sharts, I’ve made the brave and bold decision to offer up this idea in exchange for a 500 dollar Visa gift card (I will settle also for Mastercard). This offer is non-negotiable, and I will erase your memory should you decline to provide me with what I want.

Today I am proposing a Dentist office where they shut the hell up. Why do you want to talk to me so bad? There’s literally a tv show on, a drill whirring, music playing, and distant chatter. Why me? You have silenced me in the craziest way (putting metal sharp equipment near soft tissue), and now you want to know more about my life. I am begging please give me The Silent Treatment (this is the name btw).


Chipotle Raising Their Prices Will Kill Me (Fiscally)

I am a Chipotle first household. As in, It’s one of the first options on my mind when I am considering what I should eat. I will eat chipotle upwards of 3 times a week if my budget and conscience allows it. To hear that the Chipotle-Class is going to be facing a corporate tax of 2% is completely unnerving as it will now force me to reduce my consumption of Chipotle and non-Chipotle related goods. It’s a crying shame. Mr. Chipotle, if you are reading this, please think of the children and non-binary young adults.


113 Cherry St #92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2205
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It’s Cleb

…but, you knew that probably. If you didn’t I’m a gay, non-binary, gemini bimbo who loves coffee, laughing, and wiggling my butt to hyperpop. I send a seriously unserious email every sunday talking about goofy things I’m thinking, bad business ideas, and food that excites me.